No Clue

Still trying to figure out what I want to do with my life...

I know I want to do something to better my life and make a good living for myself and my future children. I thought about maybe doing marketing or advertising. I looked into it and I'm not sure that's what I want to do now. I don't even know. I just have no clue what I want. I want to go to school and get it over and done with before I'm ready to have kids. Someone told me that school will always be there. Which is true, but I bet it gets farther and farther away as you get older and start having kids and more responsibilities. Plus I can't pass math. Every time I think about that I get discouraged. I barely skipped by with C's in math in high school. Why must we take all of these classes where we have use equations and formulas to find the answer? I don't plan on having a career where I have to use those things, I CAN'T do them so why would I? Just let me take the classes I need please! I know I'm just repeating things from my last post but I feel very strongly on this subject lol.
I don't know. Maybe someday I'll find my calling.

Until then.. don't forget to smile

Where Do I Go From Here?

A few minutes ago while playing a game on my phone, I got lost in thought and it dawned on me that I have no idea what I want to do with my life. At the moment, I'm doing nothing. I don't work, I don't go to school. I sit at home fulfilling my wifely duties and I wait for my husband to come home from work. It's the same thing.. day in and day out. I turn 23 in a couple of months and I have no ambition, nothing to work toward.

It's odd to think that, since I was so full of crazy dreams growing up, but I think that's just what happened.. I grew up. I guess I realized those dreams really were crazy and I needed to focus on the now. Get a job, pay bills, be responsible. It's also sad to think about. I was so happy when I was full of that hunger, that drive and ambition to be someone, to show the world what I'm made of. 

When I fell in love, my dream of being a Country singer got put on the back burner, then eventually got cold and thrown away. These days, I can't even sit and play my guitar for longer than ten minutes, let alone write a song. I started to go to school to be a personal trainer, it took me two years after high school to decide it's what I wanted to do. At the beginning of my second semester, Dr. Hobbs told our class a story from when she was teaching an online fitness class and getting an email from a female student. The email said something along the lines of, "I am overweight and haven't left my home in [so many] years." I remember Dr. Hobbs telling us that at the bottom of the email, the student wrote, "Please help me." I remember getting chills at that moment. Dr. Hobbs went on to tell us what she told the student to do and kept working with her throughout the rest of the semester. She then told us she got an email at the end of the semester from that student that said, "I went outside today... Thank you for changing my life." That was my "That is what I want to do" moment. I wanted to do this to help people, I wanted to change lives. Halfway through my second semester, I fell into a depression from stress caused by different things going on in my life at the time. I just didn't have the motivation to write that research paper and it unraveled from there. Why did I need to write ANOTHER research paper? I already proved I could do that in high school. What did writing research papers have to do with bettering others lives through fitness? In fact what did any of these core classes have to do with that? I didn't need to find x to teach someone an exercise, I took speech as a freshman in high school and passed with flying colors. I just wanted to do the classes for my major, that's what I was interested in, that's why I was there. Were all these extra classes really necessary? I was done. I quit going to math; I wasn't going to pass anyway, why waste my time? I worked with a tutor, and when I was sitting with him I did great. I understood it, I could do it, and correctly at that. When it came time to take my midterm without my trusty tutor by my side, I tried it, thinking I was doing it right, and got EVERY question wrong. I failed my midterm. I'd never failed anything in my life. Who wouldn't be feeling a little defeated. I quit going to my English class, I just didn't want to do that damn research paper. I also quit going to my speech class. Why should I listen to a woman who can barely even speak english, tell me how to speak in front of people? So there went that. Sorry mom, I know you were excited about me going to college. At least I passed the three classes that I did stay in. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be, after all,  I don't even have to motivation to work out myself, how can I motivate someone else to do it. I sure as heck don't want to be a hypocrite. 

Sometimes I feel like I should move to California and try my hand at acting. I think I'd be good at it; although I've never actually done it, not even a school play. I still think I'd be good at it though. I think I would've been a good Katniss Everdeen. If I ever got the opportunity, I'd do it in a heartbeat. 

Then sometimes I think I should move to Nashville, pick up my guitar and grab a hold of that dream again. The only problem is that I'm what you would call a "chicken-s***." I held onto that dream since I was little and was too scared to ever do anything to make it happen. I had a chance to try out for a reality singing competition when I was in Nashville, but wouldn't do it. Heck, American Idol came to Joplin and I didn't even do that. To be fair though, I had a sinus infection when American Idol came through town. What would it have hurt though?

Maybe that's my problem. Maybe I'm too afraid of failure to try to go after anything, so I just stay in the comfort and safety of home. 

Why can't I have it all figured out like some people?

I wonder if it all just comes down to motivation. Up until three years ago, the only thing I ever wanted to do was sing. I had the drive, the inspiration, the desire. Why did that have to go away?

Maybe I'll just go and get my core classes done and I'll figure it out somewhere along the way. 

The only thing I know is that, whether it was with music or fitness, I just wanted to change someone's life, make a difference. Even if it was just a small one. 

At the end of the day, I just want to be someone my family can be proud of, someone my nieces and future children can look up to...set a positive example. 

Here's a thought: maybe I should go into creative writing.. ha!

Please Come Home Soon..

 "I wonder, I pray

I sleep alone

I cry alone

And it's so hard living here on my own...

I walk alone

I try alone

I'll wait for you

Don't want to die alone

So please come home soon"

      Words any Military significant other or family member can relate with. This song, "Come Home Soon" by Shedaisy, gets me through a lot of days. They say, and by they, I honestly have no idea who, that being a Military wife is one of the hardest jobs there is. I was up for the challenge but didn't know how hard it really would be until he deployed on December 11, 2011. Here we are, almost eight months in, and it's still as hard as it was the day he left. I can honestly say this is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I know at only 21 years of age, some of you may say i'm still young and have plenty of trials and tribulations headed my way in the years to come. And I agree, but once we make it through this deployment, I'll know I have the strength to get through anything God throws at me. 

      Now in the beginning, I believe I did pretty well. I surrounded myself with family and friends, even got myself a puppy. I even did pretty good for not hearing from him for a while, while he was getting where he needed to be and getting settled in. Christmas wasn't the best I'd ever had, but I made it through. I was bummed when New Year's came around and I finally had someone to kiss at midnight, except he was halfway around the world. When my birthday came around, all I wanted was a call from him, which I got, and my day was complete! By the next month though, and this was three months in, I had fallen into a slump. I couldn't get myself to get out of bed in the morning. And I don't mean just because I was tired and didn't want to get up, I mean I was awake and had no desire to get up and do anything at all. I missed an entire week of classes..the week after spring break... I missed half of the next week and finally went to three classes for the rest of the semester. I ended up only passing those three classes, out of six. Once classes were over, it was time to really start cracking down on the wedding plans, which was June 9th. With the help of my cousin and maid of honor, Lindsay, I began to consume myself with wedding todo's and decisions to make, and believe me, for only having less than a month left, there were a lot of decisions still to make. (I'm kind of a procrastinator, and every time I would try, I would just get overwhelmed.) Before I knew it, it was time for him to come home on R&R and I found myself cleaning my house like a mad woman preparing for his arrival. Cleaning toilets, mopping floors, making beds, even giving the dogs baths. Baby Clyde needed to smell and look nice for his daddy since it was the first time they met. 

      When I got the call from him telling me when he would be landing it was a mad and exciting dash for the airport. The whole drive I wondered what I would do or say when I first met him. Surprisingly I got to the airport fast, maybe too fast. I didn't know if I was quite prepared for our first reunion after 6 months. So I sat in the cell phone lot until I saw a plane fly over that I presumed was his. About ready to pee my pants, I made my way into the airport baggage claim. I quickly found a restroom, checked my appearance in the mirror and headed to the waiting area with the rest of the individuals patiently awaiting the arrival of their loved ones and friends. I still didn't know what to do or think. I wasn't sure if I should sit or stand, was I going to cry when I saw him, would I be nervous or would it feel like it was just yesterday when we were last together? What would his reaction be? As the passengers began walking out of the terminal area my nerves went crazy and my heart began to race. I began to nervously look for him, trying to bend my vision around the wall separating where I was sitting and where he would walk in. It seemed like forever, like there couldn't possibly be that many people on the plane, it seemed as though the line of people would never end and he was at the end of the never ending line. Finally, there he was! My mind went completely blank, I jumped up and calmly, but quickly, walked to him and finally wrapped my arms around him. I buried my face into his chest and when he tried to pull away and I wouldn't let go, he asked if I was crying. I managed to get out, "Well I wasn't," as tears began to roll down my cheeks. It felt so good to have his arms around me again and to be able to wrap mine around him, I didn't want to let go. 

    The next few days were great and it felt as though he had never even been gone. I called the caterers the day before the wedding to check on things and found out we had lost them. This was my breakdown moment. Lance came in and wrapped his arms around me and told me it was going to be ok. Let me tell you, it's truly a blessing to have someone in your life who makes you feel better just by taking you in their arms and saying five little words. So off to Sam's Club we went! Luckily, we have amazing family and friends who stayed up late the night before the wedding to put together an incredible spread for our guests to feast on. The upside? We saved $200 by not using the caterers! Although, we will forever be in debt to those crazy folks who helped us pull it off, but they aren't a bad group to owe one to :). The wedding went off without a hitch and his R&R was over before we knew it. 

       Now, I knew from the beginning of this whole thing, that saying goodbye after his R&R would be the hardest part of all. Boy oh boy, why did I have to be right? I cried myself to sleep the night before he left and when we went to leave for the airport I choked back tears and had to turn away and quickly ask if my sunburn was peeling so he wouldn't know why I really turned away. We went and had lunch in silence, and rarely spoke on the long drive to Tulsa. We rolled up to the airport, it was the moment we both dreaded, it was time to say goodbye. We both held it together surprisingly well as we hugged for the last time for another 5 months. He walked into the airport and as he walked by the window where I was still sitting in my car, he turned and waved goodbye. I lost it. I cried the whole way home as the image of him waving goodbye flashed over and over in my mind. The closer to home I got, the thought of having to go back without him hit harder and harder. As I turned onto my street and saw my house, I began to sob uncontrollably. I made my way into the house and went straight to my bed and cuddled with the clothes he'd left on my bed. I slept with those clothes for the next couple weeks until his smell had finally faded. I found myself in that same slump I had been in back in March. I couldn't sleep, I didn't really have an appetite, and I was at least an hour late to my babysitting job everyday. I'm out of that slump now, I honestly don't know what it was that got me past it. Maybe it was the thought that I've done this before and that I have less time left this time around. Everyday is closer to him coming home to me for good. I'm used to this deployment now, although it still scares the hell out of me. It's still as hard as it was at the beginning, but i've learned ways to deal with it, and I get to hear from him almost daily. I just pray that he comes home to me safely and that that image of him waving goodbye isn't the last I see of him. 

     Kudos to the military spouses and families who go through more than one of these dreaded deployments. I thank God that this is our one and only. I just want to sleep next to him again. I can't wait to wrap my arms around you again, baby. See you soon, my love. 

Don't forget to smile Lancer,

Kylee :)

Long Time No See

I know it's been almost a year since my last post, but I have recently been inspired to start writing again. So, I'm going to try to write more, maybe once a week if I can. I just have to be inspired, have something to write. But for those of you who gave me such great feedback when I started this blog, this one is for you. And thanks for reading and enjoying my thoughts.


I believe my last post was about a guy that I had just started dating.. and oh man has a lot happened since then!

So since so much has happened, I think I'll just put it all in order, at least mostly in order.
That special guy and I really hit it off when I went and visited him in Seattle. We had a blast. I'm sure most of you know this already though lol. We have continued to date since then, but this summer we found out he would be deploying to Afghanistan. (In case you forgot, he's in the Army.) We knew already we wanted to get married, to each other of course, so we decided when he came home on his mid-tour leave in June, we would get hitched. I immediately started thinking about things for the wedding and had already asked all of my bridal party if they would like to be in my wedding. More on that later...
He did the same and when he came home for leave in November we had lots to do. Within a few weeks we got officially engaged (and by officially I mean he got down on one knee and popped the question, the way it's supposed to be done), we got our engagement pictures done, picked out cake flavors and designed the cake, met with the pastor, got him fitted for a tux, and even registered for our wedding gifts. It was a lot to get done, but somehow we managed, and that's even between spending time with BOTH of our families. Did I mention my family absolutely loves him and is super excited to welcome into the family? Oh and just so you don't think otherwise, I absolutely love his family as well. I'll be getting a little brother and sisters, which I've always wanted. And his mom and dad are great too. Since I've spent time with him and his family, the Chicago Bear fanatics have almost converted me to a fan of "da bears."
Moving on.... Since all of this, Lance, the special guy who's name I don't believe I've mentioned, has deployed to Afghanistan. I think we're both taking it as well as we can, we each have things we need to focus on more than being sad all the time. We get to talk at least every few days so it isn't really too bad. And considering our entire relationship, with the exception of a couple of months total, has been long distance anyway. The only difference is not being able to text all day and talk and skype/facetime for hours each night. So it has been hard, not knowing what he's doing, where he is, if he's ok, when I'll get to talk to him again. But what can you do, besides try to keep busy and keep your mind occupied? You can't help the thoughts that come into your mind, they are always there, so I face the facts, say a prayer and move on with my day hoping maybe I'll get to hear his voice soon.
Ok so to go back a little, between visiting Lance in Seattle and him deploying, I started school in August. I enjoy it for the most part, with the exception of a few things, but there will always be something. I'm pretty proud of myself for trying to better my life and hey, I even made the dean's list. Only one from the giant town of Alba! If you know Alba, you know that's a joke... But back to everything that has happened.. I found out I'm going to be an aunt again, which is exciting because I love seeing precious little babies. And speaking of my sister, I know I didn't really mention her but in a way I did because she's my only sibling so the only way I can be an aunt again is through her, I had originally asked her to be my maid of honor for the wedding. I thought it was only fair because I was her maid of honor for her wedding, a marriage which didn't turn out to last too long..sorry Andy... Well a few weeks ago Kristin and I got into an argument because I was trying to give her a suggestion on what she should do to get her priorities in order (trying to make it seem nicer than I really was about it) and she got an attitude and told me to "f*** off." So that was it and I told her she wasn't my maid of honor anymore and asked my cousin Lindsay's to do the honors instead. Which has already proved to be a better decision since she is already planning my bachelorette party (oh boy...).

So I think that pretty much sums up everything that has happened with me in the past 10 months in a nutshell. All I can do now is be patient for the next 129 days for my groom to come home. Hope it wasn't too crazy to read. Be looking for more posts!

Until next time, don't forget to smile,,
Kylee :)

I've Been Spending All My Time Just Thinking 'Bout You :)

So how do you know? How do you know when it's love?

I think I'm starting to understand. 

I've finally found someone, someone who makes me happy, who i can't wait to hear from and talk to.

I get to wake up to sweet little messages all the time. When I wake up in the morning, the first thing I do is check my phone to see if he sent me a text. I think about him all day, and I think about him when I'm trying to sleep. Just talking to him gives me butterflies.

Oh, and as always, there's a small catch. He lives in another state. :(

He's in the army and he's stationed just outside of Seattle, Washington.

I am going there in just under two weeks though, I'm very excited. He's got so many plans! 

We are going to have so much fun!

I know it's cliche, but I've really never felt this way before. 

I have never met a guy who I want to talk to 24/7. Who gives me butterflies like this. 

I usually get tired of guys, find them annoying, or just don't really care. With him, I wanna talk to him, I wanna see him, I'm bummed when we don't get to talk. I'm really excited about him! 

I really, really, REALLY like him!! =D

So call me crazy, but I'm really falling for him. Like biting my tongue, falling for him. 

So I hope it works out! Wish me luck :)

So Until Next Time...

Don't Forget To Smile :)

I know I won't have a problem with that!

Kylee <3

In The Words of JB..."I Just Need Somebody to Love.."

Well, here we go again, touching on that second "L" word in the title of my blog.
I believe I have been given a dose of my own medicine..
As I told everyone in my "I'm Sorry" post, I don't want to let people in, so I find things I don't like about them and then basically I find them annoying. Well I finally found a guy that I liked and wanted to try to have a relationship with. Although he attends college in a different state, I was willing to make it work, because frankly, I would really just like "somebody to love." He didn't text much, said he just didn't check his phone a lot. I would just text him when I was bored and hope he would text back. I would hear my phone go off and I would honestly think, "Please let it be him!"
Just. My. Luck. He didn't talk to me a for a while, so I backed off a little, just figured he was busy. A couple days went by and I tried him again, only to get a text back from him saying, "Why do you keep calling me?" I was completely baffled. What had I done wrong? I had never even called him. I finally got through to him and asked him if I did something wrong...His response: "just annoying."
Damn. I thought since he started talking to me first and asked me first if I wanted to hang out that he would at least get to know me better, give me a chance. He had to have felt something...right?
I guess he's just like every other guy. Only wants one thing, and when they find out I've never been that far before, they either flee, or become a stage 3 clinger.
Why can't life just be easy?

Moving on though, I'm talking to another guy who I like, and have liked since high school. I'm trying not to get annoying, but he's kinda like the other guy, he doesn't text much... We'll see what happens..
I guess it's just my gypsy soul, maybe I really am just "better as a memory."

So Until Next Time...
Maybe I'll Find That Smile Someday. :)

10 Things You Didn't Know About Me

#10- My favorite singer in the whole wide wor- Oh wait, everybody already knows that.

Let's try that again...
#10- I'm actually a really shy person when I first meet someone.
  #9- I'm a clean freak, and can sometimes be a little OCD about it.
  #8- I'm a Belieber.
  #7- I'm a homebody.
  #6- I want to go skydiving so bad!!
  #5- I've never been drunk.
  #4- I've never done any kind of drugs and don't plan on ever doing any.
  #3- I'm honestly worried that I'll never settle down because of my gypsy soul.
  #2- I suffer from anxiety and sometimes have panic attacks.
  #1- My biggest fear is failure.

So now you know a little more about me!

So Until Next Time...
Don't Forget To Smile!!

Letter to Heaven

I thought of you today. I took Levi for a walk and found your collar when I was looking for a leash.

Today is perfect. You would absolutely love it! I can see you out in the yard just laying down in the sun, letting the wind blow as you stick your nose up towards the sky. It's days like these I think of you the most. Also when the snow was everywhere we thought of you because of how much you loved the snow as well. You just loved to be outside. Even though it's still hard to except you're gone, days like these make me feel better. I know you're enjoying it up in heaven, where everyday is a perfect one. You just loved life. And we loved you, It still hurts everyday, just as bad as the day you left us. It's still just as hard to think about you, talk about you, and write about you. As I'm writing this, tears are pouring into my lap. They are peaceful tears though, because I know you are no longer suffering and you're up there with your family and friends, and knowing you are watching over us. 
I really miss you. There are still days I turn and look for you to be laying down in your usual spot in the kitchen. Those days are hard. It's hard to believe you are really gone.
It's weird to think about how much an animal can impact your heart. You are family, always will be. You're the dog I'll be telling my kids about someday.
The day we put you down, I told myself I would never get another dog again. I didn't wanna go through that again. I wish you would've had some puppies so we could still have a part of you in our lives. Although, you will always be here, in our hearts. We have so many memories with you. Like when you used to put clothes in the food bowl so levi couldn't get any, or when we turned around in the car and you had a McDonalds sack on your head trying to get the french fries that were in the bottom :). I'm happy that we've made it to the point where we can look back and smile and laugh about things like that.

I can't wait for the day when I get to see you again, hug you and pet you, see you do elvis because you're so excited to see me.

Love you Bubbers
Until we meet again,
I'll try not to forget to smile :)

I'm Sorry.

Well It's Valentine's Day, and once again I find myself alone. All day I've been thinking about why I'm single, even though I've had the chance to be in more than one relationship. I think about the person that I like, whom I mentioned in my blog yesterday, the one that I've liked for nearly 8 years. We'll call him "Tatertot." Eight Long Years.. I think he's part of the reason why I never get into a relationship. I'm too caught up in him to wanna try a relationship with anyone else. So then I think about all the people I've just kinda left hanging, those who I decided I didn't wanna give any effort towards a relationship with. The song "Better as a Memory" by Kenny Chesney comes to my mind..

"I see you leaning, you're bound to fall,
  I don't wanna be that mistake.
  I'm just a dreamer, nothing more.
  You should know it before it gets too late."

Boy can I relate to this song. I wish it was that easy, to just say that and walk away. There's always questions why, they don't understand. I think the only people who truly understand that are the people who can honestly relate. I've come to realize that I'm too afraid of getting my heart broke so I won't let anyone in. That's the other reason I'm single. If I start to feel myself getting to like someone, I push them away. I find things I don't like in them; I look for the bad, rather than the good in guys. It makes me feel like a horrible person.
There's a handful of people I can name that I've done this to. So I want to apologize. If I'm not willing to let you in, I'm just not worth it. Actually, I just wrote a new song that says, "My heart's not meant to stay in the same place, and I can promise you, It's not even worth the chase.."
So to you, I'm sorry.

There is one person in particular I really want to apologize to..
I realize that your feelings towards me are the same I have for Tatertot. I would've done anything to be with Tatertot, still would honestly, and I poured my heart out to him, just like you. I know how it feels to be in your shoes, to be the only one in love, to be willing to do anything for them and they wouldn't do the same for you. Just like "Grenade" by Bruno Mars. It sucks, I know. Trust me. That's why I feel so bad about this. So to you, you know who you are, I am truly sorry.

I wonder if I'll ever get over this Tatertot guy. I was actually doing pretty good for a little while, but I didn't last. I would like to move on with my life. I would like to let someone else in. I honestly believe that the only way I'll get over him, is for him to break my heart and prove to me he's a complete DOUCHE-BAG and that he's not worth my time and all these wasted years and tears. I'll have to admit though, I did get a lot of good songs out of my crush with Tater Tot. That's one good thing about love and heartache, they make damn good songs.
Sometimes I wonder if that's also a reason that I am the way I am. I'm a songwriter, we look for inspiration in true-life experiences. Heartbreak, sadness, loneliness...they make better songs. I wonder if I really do have a gypsy soul.. I don't think I'm meant to stay in one place for too long. I really wish I could share the lyrics of my new song, but I don't have a copyright on it. Just reading the lyrics would make you understand how I am.
See, as I'm typing this, I have a guy asking me if I wanna hang out this weekend, but I'm resisting. I'm trying to change that, I would really like to at least..

It's getting late and I'm getting tired and might start to not make sense lol. So I will leave you with this..
I hope I find love one day, I hope everyone does, no one deserves to be lonely forever. I know God has a plan for me and I'm excited to see what it is! So I'm just gonna go with the flow and see what is in store for me! Thanks for reading!

So Until Next Time..
Don't Forget To Smile :)

What I'm About

Hey there, I'm Kylee... I just wanted to introduce myself and tell you what I'm all about.
I decided to start my own blog after watching the movie "Easy A." If you haven't seen the movie yet, first off you have no life and you are really missing out on a great movie, but it's about a high school girl who, by telling one little white lie, makes herself to be the center of attention. I'm not going to go into great detail because you really need to watch the movie and I don't wanna give it away. Anyway, she uses a live blog to explain herself, apologize to those she hurt and set the school straight. This inspired me.

I've always enjoyed writing. It was always my favorite subject in school, and I've written songs since I was 12. Writing was my way of expressing myself and my emotions, random thoughts, bad days, my crush on that one guy that I've liked since sixth grade(those who know me well enough know who I'm talking about). So I decided to share all of this with anyone who is willing to read it I guess. Hopefully someone will read this, even if they don't, at least I'm not holding it all inside.

Moving on now...
So more about me.. I live in a small town in Southwest Missouri. It's very boring here, so I'm not going anymore into it. I'm huge on family! My family is absolutely crazy, in a good way of course! We're very close and would drop anything on a moments notice if a loved one was in need of help. We definitely know how to have a good time, when we are all together, you better watch out because like I said, we get crazy! I love them and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them. I know that's cliche but it's the truth. I can't imagine not having a close family like I do, I think it's odd when families aren't this way. Isn't that what family is all about?
I absolutely love music! It is my LIFE, if you didn't get that by just reading the title of my blog.. I sing, write songs, and play a little guitar. I'll listen to just about anything, but the music I write is Country Music. Music is my constant, the one thing I've always had, and it's amazing to know that it will always be there. It's my inspiration in everything I do, I honestly think I wouldn't be the person that I am today if it wasn't for the influence that music has had on my life.

I don't wanna go too far away from the reason I'm writing this blog so I'm just going to come out and say it. My life goal is to make a difference in someone's life, or inspire them or touch them in one way or another. Up until recently, I thought that would happen through my music. Before this past month, music was the only thing I've ever wanted to do. I didn't go to college right out of high school because I had originally planned on moving to Nashville, TN, to pursue my dream of being a country music singer. Well there I was nearly two years later, still in this tiny town and really having no idea of what direction I wanted my life to go. It took me long enough, but I've finally decided that I want to go to college, do the kinesiology program and get certified to be a fitness trainer. Now, not only will this help me to stay healthy and make better lifestyle choices, I can make a change for the better in someone that needs it. I can make a HUGE difference in more than one persons life. So if music doesn't work out for me, at least my life goal will be accomplished!

So in conclusion, as random as this post seems, this is how my whole blog will be. I can be a very random person at times and in others I can be very serious and passionate about something. I hope you enjoy this blog that I will dub a "Roller Coaster Ride." Hopefully I can make you laugh, cry, think, or just smile. I also hope I don't get too annoying, because I'm sure some of my true colors will come out every now and then.

So Until Next Time...
Don't Forget to Smile :)